10 Memorable Horror Titles
So yesterday I was sinking an after-work pint at my local, one eye on the Horse races I was losing on, the other eye perusing film reviews on my phone.
I came across a French/Mexican Post-Apocalyptic Horror film that was making waves called ‘We Are the Flesh‘ – and it turned out to be that rarest of beasts, one that had sickening gore (the reviewer lumped it in with luminaries such as Nekromantic and August Mordem), but was also actually good (sitting at a respectable 75% on Rotten Tomatoes).
I texted a fellow gore-hound Thomas to inquire if he had heard anything about this. His response:
Rings a bell, but also sounds easily confused with any number of highly touted generic releases in recent years.
Sending me links to similar titled Horror films We Are Still Here, and We Are Who We Are. The argument was being made that the titles of modern Horror films were starting to blur into an indistinguishable mush.
Google concurs! Typing We Are the Flesh into the search engine revealed We Are Still Here as the fifth ranked link.
The conversation continued this morning as I brought up the topic with my workmate and fellow gore-hound (yep, I know some freaks) Pete. I bemoaned the fact that Horror Movie Titles, once the most colourful of all the genres, had degraded into a world of easily confused blandness, and usually the critically acclaimed flicks were the worst offenders – recent hits The Witch and The Invitation coming to mind. Pete agreed, admitting that he had recently confused It Follows with It Comes at Night.
We then made it our mission to find ten Horror Titles that did stand out, and we planned to accomplish this by lunch time (we probably had more important things to do, so don’t tell my Boss for fuck’s sake). The following list bares the fruit of our labor. I wanted to go down the cunty click-bait route and declare this article The 10 Craziest Horror Titles Ever!!!, but it would have been an insincere boast as I knew I probably would stumble upon even better ones within days of posting. (Edit: found three more already a day later, I’ll save those for the sequel to this post)
Flower of Flesh and Blood. Can’t have a list like this without the world-famous Guinea Pig series. This particularly one had (a pre crazy) Charlie Sheen contacting the FBI, mistaking it for a snuff film.
Sometimes Aunt Martha Does Dreadful Things. Rest of the time she’s a saint, I swear!
Not the greatest title, but I fucking love that tagline.
Werewolf in a Women’s Prison? This sounds like the wildest prison in America.
I stand corrected!
Translation: Even the Wind is Scared. Jesus, how terrifying does a scenario have to be for the fucking wind itself to shit it’s pants?
So much pun love on this one. Gary Busey voiced the titular character in the first film, Obviously I need to give this series a peep.
Be a good kid, and you just might find a copy of Slaughtered Vomit Dolls under the Christmas tree this year.
From Troma, of course. I think they created this title by simply combining the last few winning words from the local Scrabble tournament.
I love this one – there’s already a dozen Horror films telling you not to go in the woods. This one is saying feel free to enter, just don’t fornicate there. Horny teens rarely survive these films, it’s just sound advice.
Stay tuned for another 10 Horror titles, coming to a shoddy blog near you.